Injured. Yes, again.

I somehow managed to sprain a tendon in my right thumb. Somehow. No idea when/how it happened exactly. Could've been during moving, could've been at work, could've been when I popped my knuckles one night.... no idea. But about two weeks ago, after it had been hurting for a week, I noticed a difference in the way my thumbs looked....

My left thumb, at rest- vs. my right thumb, at rest. Now- I took these photos tonight, after having worn a brace on my hand for nearly two weeks now. My thumb still has very limited mobility and looks just about the same as the day I went to the doctor. They x-rayed my hand, no breaks, no fractures, nothing out of joint.... So i wear a big-ass brace (Unless i'm in the shower)

anyways. I'm a gimp. again. I guess I was due for some sort of injury, we all know i'm not the most graceful of humans. And I made it through the entire Evita run without physical mishap, so it was time for something to be broken.

Hurting your hand is way different than an ankle or foot, however. Especially your dominant hand... 

THINGS THAT ARE HARD TO DO WHILE WEARING A WRIST/THUMB BRACE:

Brush or comb or DO your hair

Lift boxes or shelves or couches while moving

Drive- (not having use of your wrist makes a big difference)
Open jars

Fasten/unfasten your bra
Grate cheese or hand plates/cups to guests at work
Use tongs to portion breadsticks/salad at work.

Use a ladle to portion soup at work.

WORK

Operate a sound-board

Cook/chop/stir food

Wash your hands
Wash dishes
Push thumbtacks into walls
Put contacts in
Makeup- specifically eyeshadow/mascara and foundation

Write with a pen or pencil legibly

Pour beverages/liquids into cups/your mouth

Typing on a keyboard

Texting

To name a few.... The doctor told me to wear the brace for a few weeks, then if there is no improvement he'd send me to a specialist. I'm giving it two more weeks and then we'll see.... I'm reals tired of being gimpy.

Listing:

Beautiful Things:

• seeing Mr. Jamie Frank and hanging out with some beautiful people
• Getting to play with my talented friends a few nights a week at Closer
• Mediocre auditions resulting in callbacks that go very well. 
• my house starting to come together.
• Sunday dinners with grandparents- with leftovers to bring home.
• Late night chats drinking Gentleman Jack with Marza
• Understanding house-mates.
• First day at my new OG store, making $60.

Things I Want/Need in my new Place:

2 tension rods
A screw-gun to mount a curtain rod above my bed.

New sheets (Black? red?)

Stools (kitchen, shower)

Shelves for bathroom ledge

Curtains for closet

light for over kitchen table

mat for buster's food

blender, waffle iron

Universal remote

DVD player

Moved.

I moved.

As of Monday I've been sleeping and living at my new place here in beautiful Salt Lake City.

Moving was a process.

Still is.
I was in limbo for a good two weeks.

My work transfer hasn't quite gone the way I wanted it to.
and the moving expenses took a toll....

BUT

By the end of this week I will have completely transitioned my life down here.

Living alone again is exciting

especially because this time it's all my own things.

I get to decorate and spruce-up and create my home however I like.

I've been unpacking for the last three days,

and I've managed to unpack about 80% of the boxes

and it's all starting to come together....

except my bedroom, which I'm too lazy to touch yet.

But by the end of this week (Or maybe next)

I will have a cozy little nook of a home
and I can bring my Buster Brown to live here

and everything's going to be grand.

The Flashback to my Childhood.

I am the perpetual NSYNC fangirl.

always have been.

there was a point in my life where you could ask me trivia questions about any of those 5 men and I would have the answer off the top of my head (birthdays, favorite food/color/number, etc.)
I have this memory from when I was in junior high: me and some of the girls celebrated Lance's birthday in the gym-locker room.

I was/am that girl.

So when the rumours started flying last week about the NSYNC reunion on the VMAs....

you bet your sweet ass I was giddy and emotional and thrilled.

No media outlet could confirm it 100%

and silly Lance made comments trying to kill the rumours. 

BUT

TONIGHT

right smack dab in the middle of Justin's 

INCREDIBLE performance

There were my boys. All looking fierce and sounding as cool and smooth as ever:

I screamed.

I giggled.

I cried.

Its true.

And then I proceeded to watch all sorts of videos from when they were popular and every ounce of fangirl in my body floated to the surface. 

Its been a magical evening.

<3

What I do.

I was chatting with someone yesterday and he was lamenting the studying process for the LSAT and said something about it not really being what he wanted to do. I said "Then why are you doing it?" and he said "It's the fallback plan." His real love is music, and he said for a while he was seriously pursuing his music career, but he got tired of being perpetually broke. The financial instability became too much for him and so he's now applying for law school. And then he asked me what my fallback plan would be... you know, if the "acting thing" doesn't work out.

And I struggled to find an answer. I said.... "Uhhhhh..... well I don't know... work in a coffee shop and get lots of tattoos and also work front-of-house in a theatre; house managing or selling concessions or something... I guess..." And I searched my brain for a better answer but couldn't. Even my fallback plan involved working in a theatrical setting.

I'm gearing up for a few auditions in the next weeks. One tomorrow at SLAC, one at HTC on the 14th, and one at Good Co. Theatre sometime soon as well. And as I'm prepping and working and thinking about each potential job I'm reminded of how lucky I am to have found my passion. It's not easy, it's not stable, but it's all I ever want to do. I don't want to teach, I don't want to take some desk job and hate my life because it's monotonous and boring. I want to be on stage, or backstage, or near a stage. I want to be contributing to the world through something creative and alive and bright and meaningful. And that's what theatre does. And that's what I get to do when I'm part of theatre.

Today I saw a trailer for a production of CLOSER that is being put on by 5 of my favorite humans ever. It spend a lot of time talking about the process of creating theatre and how thrilling it can be. And then my beautiful friend Kelsie Slaugh wrote a blog post (HERE) that really really inspired me to work harder and keep pushing forward in this business. This life is a tough one, and it involves lots of sacrifice and rough decisions but it is EXACTLY what I want to be doing.

This was my favorite part of Kelsie's post:

"But there is a reason why we compromise, a purpose behind every sacrifice!

I cannot fathom any other choice. Theatre is my art, and without it I'm not me. It's this bizarre life-blood that beats throughout the veins and arteries of anyone that is fortunate enough to fall in love with it. It infests you; changing your cells and morphing you in a way that you can't recover from. It is humanity and earth, enveloping and changing all that it touches. It is me and you and everyone and everything in-between...

This passion is indescribable. 

So here we are, the crazy-theatre-humans, gladly making the sacrifices, because we can't do anything else. I can't do anything else. We're in love with this art form and always will be. And that's just how it is. 

...and I'm so grateful that's how it is."